tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85830456130894385152024-03-14T09:57:21.768-04:00Straight Parent, Gay KidHave questions? I've been there myself and have some answers...straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.comBlogger304125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-435786397312193972019-09-03T20:38:00.000-04:002019-09-03T20:38:47.796-04:00Know Your School's LGBT Rights
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You’ve done your homework as a parent to prepare your child
for possible bullying, harassment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>According to GLSEN figures, you can expect bullying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Approximately 85% of high school students
report being harassed in school because of their real or perceived sexual
orientation, 64% of students document that they are harassed because of their
real or perceived gender identity, and 31% of LGBT students surveyed said they
are harassed for their perceived gender expression.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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As I wrote in my last blog, there are ways you can make your
school your ally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, the
statistics point to the fact that only 18% of LGBT students report that their
schools have policies which offer comprehensive protections.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, what can a parent do?</div>
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You can file a complaint with the Office for Civil Rights
(OCR) at the U.S. Education Department. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You are entitled to file a claim because
public schools receive federal funding and are consequently protected under
Title IX. It prohibits harassment, including protections for gender expansive
students who don’t conform to stereotypical notions of masculinity and
femininity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It does NOT prohibit
discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity or gender
expression.</div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Time is of the essence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You must file within 180 days of when the
bullying, harassment or discrimination took place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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To file a complaint:</div>
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<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Your claim remains confidential and will not be
shared without permission.</div>
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<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>A third party may file a claim on behalf of
another person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A family member, <a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">file://localhost/pmailto/dsanchez@pflag.org.pflag.org</a>school
faculty member or a friend can file the complaint.</div>
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<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>The school cannot retaliate against anyone who
has made a complaint or testified, assisted or participated in any
investigation or proceeding under Title IX.</div>
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<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Fill out the entire form.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you don’t complete the entire form, your
complaint will be dismissed.</div>
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To file a complaint:</div>
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<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Go to <a href="http://www.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/complaintintro.html">http://www.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/complaintintro.html</a>
to file online.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After reading the
instructions, click <a href="https://www.blogger.com/Continue%20to%20Complaint%20Form">Continue to
Complaint Form</a> at the bottom of the page to get started. </div>
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Questions?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Contact:</div>
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PFLAG National:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Diego
Sanchez, Director of Policy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Phone: 202
– 467-8180, x 221.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Email:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">file://localhost/pflag.org.pmailto/dsanchez@pflag.org</a></div>
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Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) Public
Policy Office:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nathan Smith, Director of
Public Policy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Phone:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>202-621-5815. Email:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">file://localhost/glsen.org.glsen.orgmailto/nathan.smith@</a></div>
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Washington DC (Metro) Office for Civil Rights, U.S.
Department of Education.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Phone:
202.453-6020.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>TDD:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>877-521-2172. Email:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">file://localhost/ed.govmailto/OCR.DC@</a>
.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Office for Civil Rights enforces
Title IX.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Office for Civil Rights
has field offices in 12 U.S. states.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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The Office for Civil Rights at the U.S. Department of
Education is headquartered in Washington.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/Customer%20Service%20Hoteline%20#(800)%20421-3481.">Customer
Service Hoteline<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- (800) 421-3481.</a>
Email: <a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">file://localhost/ed.govmailto/OCR@</a>
Web: <a href="http://www.ed.gov/ocr">http://www.ed.gov/ocr</a></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-78189176073020561802019-08-26T20:41:00.000-04:002019-08-26T20:41:05.054-04:00Make The School Your Ally
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 3;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><br /></b></div>
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Last week, I addressed preparing your LGBT child for
possible bullying during the school year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s a straight parent’s homework!</div>
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Most importantly, you want to make the school your
ally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do you do this?</div>
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<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Talk to the school personnel to discover what
they regard as bullying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, keep
in mind that often teachers and other school professionals do not witness
bullying because it happens out of their sight (e.g. playgrounds, locker rooms,
bathrooms, and buses).</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Some schools have a contact person trained to
deal with bullying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The School Guidance
Counselor would know.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Write down the date, details, nature of bullying
incident, statement from your child, witnesses, and an account of your child’s
emotional state and if your child has reported it to the teacher or
principal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Keep accurate records of any additional incident
that may occur and any responses received from the school. These records will
serve you well in your school meetings. </div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">5.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Do NOT call the parents of the bully.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It could backfire on your child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Request that the officer visit the bully for
a talk.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">6.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Trust your instincts and your child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He knows best and is the victim.</div>
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</span>Think of them as school allies.</div>
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According to Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D., co-author of <u>When
Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know </u>(Sterling, 2016), “it takes time
to stop bullying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be persistent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can develop a “radar” for discovering
whether this is going on.”</div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-36575885003148654422019-08-19T21:13:00.000-04:002019-08-19T21:13:46.915-04:00When School Feels Dangerous To Your LGBT Child
<br />
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in;">
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
GLSEN, the Gay, Lesbian and
Straight Education Network, is the leading national education organization
focused on ensuring safe schools for all students. New data from the GLSEN
National School Climate Survey of LGBT students shows that although homophobic
remarks and verbal harassment in schools has leveled off for the first time in
a decade, nevertheless victimization, based on <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">gender expression, </i>has increased. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
Every child deserves a safe
environment in which to learn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet
according to the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Human Rights Campaign, </i>LGBT
youth are twice as likely as their peers to say they have been physically
assaulted, kicked or shoved at their school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They are more apt to miss as much as a day of school per month, according
to GLSEN, because they are bullied.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
What constitutes bullying?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not the same as teasing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s defined as unwanted aggressive behavior
among school-aged kids that involves a real or perceived power imbalance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It includes actions such as making threats,
spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally and excluding
someone from a group on purpose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
The lazy days of summer are almost over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The new backpacks, sharpened pencils,
notebooks come shuffling into school soon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So do the bullies who can make your child’s school year a living Hell
unless you help your child prepare NOW!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">What Parents Can Do:</b> <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Devise
A Plan Now</b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 74.65pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Although you want the school to be an ally in
combating bullying, keep in mind that often teachers and other school professionals
do <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not </i>witness bullying because it
happens out of their sight (e.g. playgrounds, locker rooms, bathrooms, and
buses.)</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 74.65pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Role play with your child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pretend you’re the bully and have your child
develop pat answers.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 74.65pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Reverse roles.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 74.65pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Brainstorm about alternating their route home so
that an adult is always present.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
Psychiatrist Jonathan L. Tobkes,
M.D., co-author of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>When Your Child Is
Gay: What You Need To Know </u></i>(Sterling: 2016), “assure your child that
being a bullying victim is not his fault.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Many children will feel humiliated and ashamed and think they have
brought it on themselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do not BLAME
the child for being bullied.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tell your
child to come to you immediately if anyone is making disparaging remarks or
threats.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">How Do You Get Your Child to Open Up?</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Listen and focus on him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Emphasize that bullying should not be tolerated.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Let him know that his home, school, community
will want to protect him.</div>
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Says Dr. Tobkes, “ parents are the most effective deterrent
to bullying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have found that the most important
prognostic indicator for a child being targeted for his sexuality is having a
safe haven retreat at home.”</div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-33052098945543329032019-07-26T16:12:00.000-04:002019-07-26T16:12:23.146-04:00Parents Can Struggle for Years When Their LGBT Kids Come Out
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;">
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></div>
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According to a new important study,
headed by David Huebner, PhD, MPH, associate professor of prevention and community
health at the George Washington University Milken Institute School of Public
Health, many parents still say after two years that it is moderately or very
hard for them to adjust to the news of their childrens’ coming outs. In fact,
the responses from the questionnaires of 1,195 mothers and fathers with gay,
lesbian or bisexual children between the ages of 10 and 25, showed that the responses
were, on the average, the same for the parents who have <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">recently</i> learned about their child’s sexual orientation. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: -.5in; tab-stops: 4.5pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 4.5pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>The
parents were asked “ How hard is it for you, knowing that your son or daughter
is gay, lesbian or bisexual? on a five-point scale, with five being extremely
hard.” Funded by the National Institute of Mental Health, the researchers
found:</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 40.5pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; tab-stops: 4.5pt; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>African American and Latino parents reported
greater trouble adjusting compared to white parents;</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 40.5pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; tab-stops: 4.5pt; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Parents of older youth reported they had greater
levels of difficulty compared to parents of younger children;</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 40.5pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; tab-stops: 4.5pt; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Fathers and mothers reported similar levels of
difficulty as did parents of boys and girls. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 4.5pt;">
<a href="https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/06/190618224055.htm">https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/06/190618224055.htm</a></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 4.5pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>LGBT
children who are not accepted at home because of their sexual orientation run
the risk of depression, homelessness, suicide, substance abuse, and other
health issues.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As two years or more may
seem like an eternity for a family facing a strain between the parent and
child, Dr. Huebner recommends that future studies examine how that adjustment
process can be accelerated so kids will feel more connected to their families.</div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>There
are many reasons for parents’ rejections: fear of their children’s being
bullied, of acquiring HIV and AIDS, all covered in my book<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">file://localhost/Amazon.com:WhenYourChildIsGay/
What You Need To Know (Sterling/ 2016)</a>, co-authored with psychiatrist
Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D.</div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Says
Dr. Tobkes, “one of the most prominent reasons is denial, a defense mechanism
used by individuals to cope with a reality that is perceived as threatening or
damaging to one’s self-image or concept of the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not surprising as the vast majority of
parents don’t have expectations or wish that their child will be LGBT.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Therefore, they utilize denial in order to
cope with a reality that may be perceived as a threat to their self-image or
concept of the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Upon finding out
that a child is LGBT, many parents are unable to assimilate this new data into
their previously connected notion of their child’s identity and future life
plan.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: -.5in; tab-stops: 4.5pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: -.5in; tab-stops: 4.5pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>In order to come to terms with
acceptance, Dr. Tobkes suggests the following:</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; tab-stops: 4.5pt; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Confront and break down your denial by working
through your own feelings.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; tab-stops: 4.5pt; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>What is your baseline notion of what it means to
be LGBT?</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; tab-stops: 4.5pt; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>The most important steps for working through
your denial involve having direct and honest conversations with your child and
other family members, reaching out to friends and community supports for
additional guidance.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; tab-stops: 4.5pt; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Or seek help with a trained professional.</div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>The
good news of the Huebner study is that this difficulty appears to decline
within five years for most parents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Huebner says most parents, even those in shock, when first learning the
news, care deeply about their children and eventually do adjust.</div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-24305446573433329822019-07-15T22:02:00.000-04:002019-07-15T22:02:15.749-04:00Today Is Non-Binary Day
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
PRIDE month in many cities has come to a close, but not its
impact.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crowds of the non-binary
population swelled the streets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, how
do you define non-binary?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It’s an umbrella term for a person who identifies with or
expresses a gender identity that is neither entirely male nor entirely
female.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s the opposite of cisgender
(attracted to the opposite sex only).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Under this umbrella term are spokes relating to the
non-binary term such as <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Androgynous </i>that
means identifying and/or presenting as neither specifically masculine nor
feminine, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">gender-fluid </i>means one who
embraces fluidity of gender identity, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">agender
</i>is one who doesn’t identify a particular gender, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">gender non-conforming </i>is one whose physical or behavioral
characteristics don’t correspond to the traditional expectations of their
gender, and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">gender-queer </i>is one who
doesn’t identify with a single-fixed gender.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 2;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 2;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Not Just For Movie Stars</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It’s no so unusual to be non-binary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to a 2018 Gallup poll, the percentage
of American adults identifying as LGBT rose to 4.5% in 2017, greater than 4
percent in 2016.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Gallup estimated that roughly ½ of those who self-identify
as LGBT are bisexual.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Freud’s theory of sexuality as a continuum is being played
out. Despite Freud’s theory, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>many
parents may be shocked if they are told that their child is bisexual.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Many bisexuals “pass” as straight because they
are also interested in the opposite sex. Consequently, parents will hold onto
the dream of their child marrying the opposite sex.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Like society, parents believe you have to choose
one sexual orientation or the other.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bisexuals
are looked askance by some such as lesbians <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>who regard them as “half-queer” and sleeping
with the enemy.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Others may regard bisexuals as being greedy with
voracious sexual appetites being satisfied by both sexes.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, how should a parent react?<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Remember that adolescence is a time of trying on
different identities.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Your child could be bisexual and believes he is.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Don’t tell them to “get off the fence” and
choose!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They don’t need the added
pressure!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Recommends psychiatrist Jonathan L. Tobkes,
M.D., co-author of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">When Your Child Is
Gay:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What You Need To Know (</i>
Sterling, 2016), tell your child how pleased you are that he shared such
intimate important information with you. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For example, you can say “I want you always to
feel like you can talk to me about any aspect of your life without worrying
that I will judge you!”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 1.5in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>“Say that you love your child very much and that
is what matters most,” suggests Dr. Tobkes.<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 126.65pt; mso-add-space: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 3;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 2;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.25in;">
<br /></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-8536234490190876742019-07-07T15:25:00.000-04:002019-07-10T10:19:05.590-04:00Majority of LGBTQ Black & African American Youth Can't Relax At Home<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7ra8BUTqxw-oYT4ZmOdQFPTtmAd-g7hi71ZggEWE0RcF-rHwL5w1btbwEikqDi6nHUHWtfUVQnP8u68eHvH1mvDUli0PBcMi-uxXfAWPj9eI8ffo3QCtfO02wgkCxSE9CQ4hiv2VHHXbw/s1600/moonlight.webp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="550" data-original-width="1200" height="146" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7ra8BUTqxw-oYT4ZmOdQFPTtmAd-g7hi71ZggEWE0RcF-rHwL5w1btbwEikqDi6nHUHWtfUVQnP8u68eHvH1mvDUli0PBcMi-uxXfAWPj9eI8ffo3QCtfO02wgkCxSE9CQ4hiv2VHHXbw/s320/moonlight.webp" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">blackyouthproject.com</b></div>
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HRC Foundation and University of Connecticut’s report “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Black & African American LGBTQ Youth
Report,” </i>released last February, details the experiences of Black and
African-American LGBTQ youth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nearly
1,700 young people, ranging in age from 13 to 17, took part in this HRC’s
online 2017 LGBTQ Teen Survey.</div>
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What they shared was dismal:</div>
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</span></span></span>They have heard their own family members say
negative things about LGBTQ people.</div>
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</span></span></span>80% usually feel depressed, down, worried,
nervous or panicked.</div>
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<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Nearly half feel critical of their LGBTQ
identities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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</span></span></span>90% of respondents have experienced racial
discrimination.</div>
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</span></span></span>Only 19% of Black and African-American youth
feel completely comfortable in their households.</div>
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Many of these youth are not only dealing with sexual
harassment, but also racial basis. What can parents do to lighten their
children’s burden? Here are some suggestions:</div>
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</span></span></span>Make your home a safe haven where your child
feels accepted. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Try not to judge!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Open up discussions about <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">other</i> LGBT people to get your child to
open up about his/her/theirs sexual identities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Ask your LGBTQ child the same questions you ask
your heterosexual child:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>his love
interest, what’s happening with that special person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you have your cisgender child’s
boyfriend/girlfriend to dinner, also invite your LGBTQ child’s
boyfriend/girlfriend as well.</div>
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</span></span></span>Don’t avoid the topic of dating and
relationships.</div>
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<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Share the same information you would with family
members and friends about your child being gay, including his dating life as
you would with them about your straight child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
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</span></span></span>Ask the child how he wants to handle letting
relatives and close family friends know. </div>
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</span></span></span>If you feel that having a happy child is more
important than having a child who fits a certain mold you will be more likely
to accept having a gay child than those who hold firmly to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">preconceived </i>beliefs.</div>
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If issues are holding you back from accepting your LGBTQ
child, there are more tips in Wesley C. Davidson’s and Dr. Jonathan L. Tobkes’s
co-authored book <a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">http://www.WhenYourChildIsGay:
What You Need To Know (Sterling: 2016)</a></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-60031896150974388232019-06-24T14:43:00.000-04:002019-06-24T18:22:59.249-04:00A Middle Schooler once called “It” Helped Changed SEX Education in Arizona<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkJlRB_c057SnzEZMPYW_YuBCxIhlDKMJdeUmyY2deb0xC-2vpmaGoVHsMLr9INXITXt301kofkQ9NezXFq8Kg8M2lk9zTxQ7fON9VHEng4OjRoM35Ch8YLtrRAvP7PhaZTVjmfcZ3wfGq/s1600/5cca39588c8b3.image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="814" data-original-width="1200" height="217" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkJlRB_c057SnzEZMPYW_YuBCxIhlDKMJdeUmyY2deb0xC-2vpmaGoVHsMLr9INXITXt301kofkQ9NezXFq8Kg8M2lk9zTxQ7fON9VHEng4OjRoM35Ch8YLtrRAvP7PhaZTVjmfcZ3wfGq/s320/5cca39588c8b3.image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Credit: <span class="credit"><span class="tnt-byline">Mike Christy / Arizona Daily Star
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Santi Ceballos, 13, from Tucson, Arizona came out as
non-binary in September 2017.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many of
his former classmates called him “it” because he doesn’t identify as being male
or female and is possibly transgender.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Santi uses the pronouns they and them in regards to they’s sexual
identities.</div>
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In the fall of 6<sup>th</sup> grade, Santi attended <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Camp Born This Way</i> for transgender,
gender creative and gender non-conforming kids living in Arizona.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Santi knits and is fond of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Ru Paul’s Drag Race.</i></div>
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However, he was not fond of being bullied at his former
middle school so he transferred to another one, slightly more progressive,
Paulo Freire Freedom School,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According
to GLSSEN, which does climate surveys of LGBT+ school students in the United
States, thirty-five percent of students who attend school in one of states with
“no promo homo law” on books experienced higher levels of harassment or assault
in schools.</div>
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In April, Republican Governor Ducey of Arizona signed
legislation striking down the state’s “no promo homo” law (ARST5-716) that was
passed in 1991.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The law was intended to
prevent sex education courses from discussing sexuality that “promotes a
homosexual lifestyle.”</div>
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As Santi was fed up with being singled out for one-on-one
sex education since they didn’t qualify for the standard sex education classes
that were divided between boys and girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Being pulled out of class and singled out for independent study was
“horrible,” reported Santi, not to mention humiliating.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The “No promo homo” guidelines prevent LGBTQ+ students from
having educational opportunities equal to those of their hetero peers,
according to a complaint filed in the U.S. District Court of Arizona this past
March.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The plaintiffs<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>claim those guidelines are unconstitutional
under The Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Lambda Legal, National Center for Lesbian Rights, Equality
Arizona filed an appeal in response to a joint lawsuit challenging K-12
guidelines.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Santi is one of two Arizona
students who signed on as lead plantiffs who claim the state’s “no promo homo”
laws effectively segregated them from peers during sex education instruction
with the same sex.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They want Arizona to
include queer identities that they can relate to in the sex education classes. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Normally shy, Santi was so fed up with the anti-LGBTQ laws
in his state, that he decided to be one of the plaintiffs who is suing the
state schools’ Chief Kathy Hoffman and the State Board of Education for enforcing
an Arizona law banning teachers from banning a “homosexual lifestyle” while
teaching students about AIDS and HIV during sex education class.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What good is sex education if <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">all</i> students don’t learn about sexual practices, health and aren’t
given practical knowledge?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to recent
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Gay Times </i>research, only 36% of
today’s youth identify as “exclusively straight.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“The times, they are a changin.’ “ Schools
should reflect this change! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-43486927373723022442019-06-13T14:40:00.000-04:002019-06-24T18:25:22.356-04:00PRIDE Flags - More Than Decoration<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEGrq70RAmotMKh5yv8L2imX59DNh15B0bWdgqDPLQXPOKXxbdJW3I5sMEG7D5ePNL9d0aO8Rg6kLGxl6zM_J75Dbmee1sUuLLq7U7G7pAjI2_aF2oVtvdwJjigHkHI6zcB1tiNt6m5GE3/s1600/4c984750af3052cf7c1a0242ea935b48_original.webp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="873" data-original-width="1552" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEGrq70RAmotMKh5yv8L2imX59DNh15B0bWdgqDPLQXPOKXxbdJW3I5sMEG7D5ePNL9d0aO8Rg6kLGxl6zM_J75Dbmee1sUuLLq7U7G7pAjI2_aF2oVtvdwJjigHkHI6zcB1tiNt6m5GE3/s320/4c984750af3052cf7c1a0242ea935b48_original.webp" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="created-by">
Created by Daniel Quasar</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 2;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
June is the month associated with PRIDE.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a month of readings, events, Stonewall
photography, exhibits, and, of course, marches and parades.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Banners and flags unfurled everywhere,
bringing the LGBTQ community together yet highlighting the differences among
different groups.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But what do the colors
actually signify in the different flags?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This could be a “JEOPARDY” Question.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here’s a primer culled from “Pride Flags have
common theme,” by Laurel Deppen, “The Louisville Courier Journal,” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>June 5, 2019, USA TODAY, to explain the
meaning and diversity of the flags:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>The 6-striped rainbow flag was originally
commissioned by Harvey Milk and made by Gilbert Baker in 1978.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It had 8 stripes:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>pink for sex, red for life, orange for
healing, yellow for sunlight, green for nature, turquoise for magic, blue for
serenity and purple for spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Later,
due to expense, the turquoise and pink were later eliminated after Milk’s
death.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>What do <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">black
and brown stripes </i>mean on a rainbow flag?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The black and brown are intended as an inclusive message for LGBTQ
PEOPLE OF COLOR.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>What do the wider blue and pink stripes mean with
a purple stripe in between on this flag? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The blue and pink represent the male and
female genders and the purple signifies sexual attraction to both men and
women. It’s a Bisexual flag.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Which flag has blue, pink, and WHITE?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The blue and pink represent the traditional
male and female gender colors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The White
is for those who are transitioning and don’t identify with the binary gender
category. It’s a Transgender Flag.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>What does a yellow stripe denote in a flag?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Along with the traditional pink and blue, the
addition of yellow means it’s a Pansexual flag intended to represent attraction
to gender-non-conforming and non-binary people.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Which flag means Asexual?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s for the asexual population who don’t
experience sexual attraction, demisexuals who experience sexual attraction to
those they have an emotional bond with, and graysexuals who experience
occasional or mild sexual attraction. Its flag has black for asexuality, a gray
area between asexuality and sexuality and demisexuality, white for sexuality,
and purple for community. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>If a flag is designed with colors that don’t
represent any gender, it’s an Intersex flag.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It is used in a human rights affirming community context.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>A very colorful flag with the traditional pink
and blue, purple for masculinity and femininity, black for all genders, and
white for lack of gender is a Genderfluid flag.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Similar to the Genderfluid flag is the
Genderqueer flag with its lavender stripe for androgyny, white for agender
identities, and green for non-binary.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a
Nonbinary flag if it contains yellow, white, purple, and black. The yellow
stripe represents gender outside of the binary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The white signifies many genders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Purple is for fluidity between genders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Black denotes the agender community. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>The flag with the most colors is the Progress
Flag.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It includes 5 additional colors to
the 6 common rainbow stripes:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>the black
and brown to represent LGBT people of color, and light blue, pink and white for
the transgender flag. It’s meant to emphasize inclusion and progression.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While the colors may signify splinter grassroot groups, the
flags are all intended to signify equality, human rights, diversity within the
LGBTQ+ community and PRIDE.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-21356976271430420182019-06-03T07:26:00.000-04:002019-06-03T07:26:38.297-04:00GAY PRIDE: WHY WE CELEBRATE, Guest Post by Bryce Thompson
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June is traditionally GAY PRIDE Month.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Today, Bryce Thompson, M.A., LMFT,
author of the forthcoming book, Are You Man Enough?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A Call to Action Guide for Straight Fathers of a Gay Son, is
writing a guest blog post on Gay Pride: Why We Celebrate! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
PRIDE counters the pain, marginalization, and attempted
“eraser” of nature’s diversity! PRIDE is the validation and visibility, in the
light of day of the LGBTQ mosaic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It validates and includes how the LGBTQ community has contributed to the
cultural landscape and wealth of knowledge for which we ALL benefit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It helps to inform and affirm
self-worth and value.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Attending PRIDE events is an opportunity for parents of all
stripes and caregivers of youth, especially self-identified or perceived “gay”
youth, to be exposed to and celebrate our existence and place in the rainbow of
humanity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just as beneficial is
the exhilaration and fun that can be experienced throughout the world.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That said, I would be remiss if I didn’t make note of the
“elephant in the room” of what too many people perceive through the
“heterosexual” lens as “inappropriate” regarding the PRIDE parade and its
outward expression of “sexuality!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>At the end of the day, it’s not so much about what a person is exposed to,
it’s that discussions are happening, i.e. teaching moments that are open and
not on its face negatively judged.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Most education takes place outside the classroom and
home!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To this end there are many
activities/events to attend and to participate in that offer insights, history,
and a variety of entertainment for all tastes and interests.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These leave the participants more
enlightened and gives them memories for years to come.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
See the link below to locate a PRIDE Festival near you and
to hear voices of what PRIDE means and its significance towards a better world
for all.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://www.gaycities.com/events/pride">https://www.gaycities.com/events/pride</a></div>
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‘</div>
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‘ youth.</div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-62592781138345419542019-05-12T16:05:00.000-04:002019-05-12T16:05:14.783-04:00Are Your Kids Mentally Healthy?
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 3;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
May is Mental Health Awareness Month.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">American Psychological Association News, </i>March 8, 2019, “more U.S.
adolescents and young adults in the late 2010's vs. mid 2000's experienced
serious psychological distress, major depression or suicidal thoughts and more
attempted suicide."</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Anxiety and depression are on the rise and suicide is now
the second leading cause of death among adolescents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As a parent, you may think your child is fine
because he doesn’t complain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, how do
you know if your child is depressed?</div>
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Here are the signs to watch out for:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Inability to fall asleep or remain asleep for at
least a week.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Loss of appetite and/or weight loss without
trying to do so.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Feelings of extreme hopelessness and a sense of
doom.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Inability to concentrate on work or family
duties.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Feeling down or sad all the time.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>No longer finding enjoyment in things or
activities that you previously enjoyed.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Thoughts of wishing he were dead and/or actual
ideas of wanting to harm himself.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Feeling consumed by intense worry or concern
that bad things are going to happen to him or his family.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 2.0in;">
From <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 2.0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Studies have shown that in the context of an unsupportive
and homophobic environment, gay and lesbian teenagers often escape into
substance abuse and other risky behaviors at a greater rate than their
heterosexual counterparts. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Parents of LGBT kids can buffer their children from bullying
and a hostile environment by keeping the lines of communication open. Steps
you can take to be your child’s ally:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Remain involved in their lives.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ask how they <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">feel </i>on a daily basis.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Don’t avoid topics that can make you feel
uncomfortable such as safe sex, harassment at school even if it may appear that
they do not want to talk.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Let them know that they are loved and that they
matter and that if something is wrong, there is still hope and it can get
better.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Seek a therapist if your child’s depression
doesn’t lift.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Talking with your LGBT kids about their mental health is one
of the most important conversations you’ll ever have.</div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-41499764094789606682019-04-30T21:13:00.000-04:002019-07-10T10:29:27.140-04:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>What
Constitutes Acceptance?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If a parent doesn’t want to march in a Gay Pride Parade, is
he not accepting of his LGBT child? If a parent doesn’t write an amicus brief
to the Supreme Court for the three cases being considered for the expansion of
the Civil Rights Act of 1967 to cover sexual harassment and gender stereotyping
at work, does that mean she’s not an ally of her child?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Not so!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Acceptance, according to Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D., co-author
of <i>When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know (</i> Sterling: 2016), involves
acknowledging the reality of a particular situation and recognizing that this
is not in your power to change it. The process of acceptance that a child has
been through often mirrors the process that a parent will go through, only your
child’s journey has begun before yours.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The most basic form of acceptance is not saying to your
child that this is a “phase” that he will outgrow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can demonstrate to your child in both words and actions
that you will always love and support him/her unconditionally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
To the accepting parent, having a happy child is more
important than having a child who fits a traditional binary mold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do you express your
acceptance?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In words and deeds
such as:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Don’t harbor differences between your straight
and gay child. Ask your LGBT child the same questions as your heterosexual
child.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Don’t avoid the topic of dating and other
relationships.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Talk to other family members and friends (with
your LGBT child’s permission, of course) openly about your child being gay and
share the same information you would with them about his dating life as you
would about your straight child.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Show interest in your LGBT child’s significant
others!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Include them in family
meals, ask about them. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
By following current news in our nation, your child may feel
more accepted and not so alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>For example, Mayor Pete Buttigieg of South Bend, Indiana is the youngest
millenial in the Democratic run for President in 2020.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pete, a Harvard graduate, who speaks
several languages, is gay, married to a teacher Chasten Glezman, and expects to
have children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Author of <i>Shortest Way Home</i>, he is the first gay man to run for President and is #3 in the polls. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
However, the starting point for acceptance is within your
home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To love your child for whom
she is and her sexuality doesn’t change that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your only concern is that she is happy.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-74647880069754892322019-04-11T17:42:00.000-04:002019-04-11T17:42:40.326-04:00Beyond “The Talk”
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 2;"> </span> </b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yesterday was National Youth HIV/AIDS Awareness Day. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The purpose of this annual day (April 10) is
to support youth HIV prevention by promoting school-based health education. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
However, I’m not “a day late and a dollar short,” because I
believe I’m on the money about the importance of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">parents</i> educating their child about safe sex, including making sure
they get tested for HIV and AIDS. Many sex education programs in schools are
wholly inadequate and don’t address LGBT students.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The statistics are alarming and underline the need for good
education:</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>41% of HIV diagnoses occur in adolescents and
young adults.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>More youth at risk for HIV, other STDs and
pregnancy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>1 in 5 new HIV diagnoses were among young people
13-24.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Only 9% of U.S. high school students have ever
been tested for HIV.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Condom use among sexually active students
decreased from 62% in 2007 to 54% in 2017.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
According to Dr. Laura Cheever, physician and associate
administrator for the HIV/AIDS Bureau at the U.S. Health Resources and Services
Administration, nearly half of all young people living with HIV in the United
States don’t know they are infected.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Young people should get tested because people living with
HIV need to be on medication so that they can live a near-normal lifespan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once they are on these medications, they have
effectively no risk of transmitting HIV to someone else,” says Dr. Cheever. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
To better support parents in their efforts, here are some
links:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 38.65pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Use the HIV Testing sites and Care Services
locator: </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 38.65pt; mso-add-space: auto;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="https://gettested.cdc.gov/">https://gettested.cdc.gov/</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 38.65pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>For the latest Youth Risk Behavior Survey (YRBS)
data:</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 38.65pt; mso-add-space: auto;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="https://go.usa.gov/xU9SS">https://go.usa.gov/xU9SS</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 38.65pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>For more in-depth information about HIV/AIDS prevention:</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 38.65pt; mso-add-space: auto;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="https://www.publicnewsservice.org/2019-04-11/hiv-aids-prevention">https://www.publicnewsservice.org/2019-04-11/hiv-aids-prevention</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
Parents
are the best teachers and know their children better than anyone else.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t leave Health Education to the
schools.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your sex education should go
beyond “the birds and the bees” so your children are not misinformed.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-76235950242707447972019-03-31T17:37:00.000-04:002019-03-31T17:37:33.555-04:00 Coming Out as Transgender
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 2;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Today is
the annual event of International Transgender Day of Visibility.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its purpose is to celebrate transgender
people and raise awareness of worldwide discrimination faced by transgender
people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Prior to 2009, the only well-known
transgender-centered holiday was the Transgender Day of Remembrance which
mourned the murders of transgender people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was a sad day, and not one that celebrated and acknowledged the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">living </i>transgender community members. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">What
Does Trans Mean?</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>A lot of
people know what it means for a person to be gay, lesbian or bisexual, but
there is still confusion and misinformation out there about what it means to be
trans. These misconceptions can result in misunderstanding, disrespect or
disbelief. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
It is not unusual for straight
parents to be baffled when their children come out as transgender, someone who
feels that their gender identity is at odds with their physical gender.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The “condition” is called <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">gender dysphoria, </i>in which a person
feels that their biological gender is at odds with their emotional and
psychological gender identity.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 2;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Steps Parents Can Take if Child Comes Out
as Transgender</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>If your
child comes out as transgender to you, feel complimented that your child feels
trusted and loved to share this important news with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If they felt that coming out jeopardized
their safety, health or living situation, they wouldn’t be divulging their
heartfelt truth about their sexual identity.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>As a
parent, you may need time to accept this new information.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It can be a shock when your child tells you
that they’re not who you thought they were.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Give yourself time to think about and try to understand what your child
is going through.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>To make it
easier on you and your child,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Listen to your child and talk to them about
their feelings.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be open and
communicative.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ask questions.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>They may want to dress or behave
differently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Allow these changes.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>See how happy your child has become once they’ve
started living as the gender they feel they actually are.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Show your support and unconditional love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ask your child which gender pronouns they
prefer and which name they want to use.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Binary pronouns like she and he will not work anymore.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once someone has decided to start
transitioning to the other gender, they are referred to with their new gender
identity, regardless of whether you’ve speaking about them before they
transitioned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For a transgender person,
they are simply being themselves and who they’ve always felt that they were.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>You may struggle at first with new pronouns, but
keep practicing and correcting yourself.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Make sure the school and doctor uses the correct
pronouns to honor your child’s identity.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .25in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .25in;">
Help your child tackle gender
dysphoria so they can become the gender they want to be.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Children who are not accepted become depressed
and self-harm or attempt suicide.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
don’t want your child to be one of the 40% who tried to attempt suicide.
Suicide is real. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For my book, <a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">file://localhost/When
Your Child Is Gay/ What You Need to Know</a>, I interviewed a female who
transitioned to male starting with hormones in college.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He told me that if he had to stay cis-gender,
he would have killed himself. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l2 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>See your GP and ask for a referral to an expert
on gender dysphoria to arrange initial assessments.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.5in;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Educate Yourself</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
These organizations can be of help for you and your child:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/National%20Center%20for%20Transgender%20Equality">National Center for
Transgender Equality</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/The%20Human%20Rights%20Campaign%20(HRC)">The
Human Rights Campaign (HRC)</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/The%20Trevor%20Project">The Trevor
Project</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/PFLAG">PFLAG</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/GLAAD">GLAAD</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/plannedparenthood.org/learn/sexual-orientation">plannedparenthood.org/learn/sexual-orientation</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
A useful book:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Gender:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your Guide.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A Gender-friendly primer on What to Know,
What to Say, What to Do in the New Gender Culture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By Lee Airton, Ph.D. (Adams Media: 2018)</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-81113960338763001772019-03-11T22:24:00.000-04:002019-03-11T22:24:40.835-04:00“You’re Bi What?”
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 3;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Most
parents and society-at-large don’t understand bisexuality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sexuality is fluid, according to Freud.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For a person having a bisexual orientation,
the orientation is not chosen even though the sex of the partner may be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to social psychologist Justin Lehmiller,
Ph.D.,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>author of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Psychology of Human Sexuality, </i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>being bisexual doesn’t necessarily mean that
you are equally attracted to both men and women. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Many high
school students today don’t like to be pigeonholed into binary roles. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They want to label themselves. Cornell
psychologist Rich Savin-Williams, Ph.D., author of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The New Gay Teenager, </i>says, according to a new study of his,
“straight people don’t exist.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your son
or daughter may try out different orientations before one feels most
comfortable.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Yet, even
from the gay and lesbian community, bisexuals experience prejudice as they do
from heterosexuals. They are looked upon as sexually confused and
promiscuous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are “on the fence”
about their sexual orientation.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>While the
message for your child is similar to that of a LGT child: listen, don’t try to
talk him/her out of their truth, love unconditionally, there are alarming
statistics re: bisexuals that you should be aware of:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>The 2015 National Youth Risk Behavior Survey of
U.S. High Students found that in the student risk behavior it examined
(planning and attempting suicide), bisexual students reported the highest risk.
According to The Bisexual Resource Center (BRC), 45% of bisexual women have
considered or attempted suicide.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Bisexuals face intense bullying and harassment
and report poorer mental health outcomes than gay, lesbian or straight youth.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Over a third of bisexuals reported not
disclosing their sexual orientation to any medical provider.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Young gay and bisexual males have disproportionally
high rates of HIV, Syphilis, and other STDs.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Adolescent lesbian and bisexual females are more
likely to have ever been pregnant than their heterosexual peers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found
that 30% of students who had sexual contact with both sexes: experienced dating
violence more than heterosexual and gay students.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
However, it is not a good idea to dwell on the potential
negativity your child may face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here’s
what you can do to lessen the impact:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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In school:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Make sure there is an ally who has your child’s
back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who knows at school of their
bisexual orientation?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are his friends
accepting or bullying?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Does the school
have abstinence-only sex education that doesn’t apply to non- heterosexuals?
Don’t leave the sex discussions up to the school health teacher. See if the
school has a GSA (Gay and Straight Alliance).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
At home:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Talk about protection from STIs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It will help your child make healthy
choices.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Also discuss consent of sexual
relationships. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>As most schools have inadequate sex education
and many teens are too fearful to tell their doctor that they are not
cis-gender, it’s up to <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>you, the parent
to be the sex educator.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Provide contacts for your child of the same age
who have similar experiences such as PFLAG.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
According to <a href="https://rewirenews/article/2018/04/04/high-risk-resources-bisexual-kids-lack-help-need-">https://rewirenews/article/2018/04/04/high-risk-resources-bisexual-kids-lack-help-need-</a>
, there are many organizations that are aimed specifically at bisexual
youth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, The Bisexual Resource
Center (BRC), in Boston, Massachusetts, America’s oldest national bisexual
organization, has many resources.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This
month, the BRC is celebrating its sixth annual Bisexual Health Awareness Month
(#BiHealth Month) <a href="https://bihealthmonth.org/">https://bihealthmonth.org/</a>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>BRC is raising awareness about the bisexual +
(bi, pansexual, fluid, queer, etc.), community’s social, economic, and health
disparities, advocates for resources, and inspire actions to improve bi+
people’s well-being.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This year’s
campaign will focus on bisexual + representation in media, politics, and
advocacy, healthcare, and education. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-31678661683462718812019-02-28T21:17:00.000-05:002019-02-28T21:17:26.333-05:00A Discriminating Vote by Methodists
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><br /></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This week, the delegates of the United Methodist Church
gathered to take a vote on whether to reinforce a ban on gay marriage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This second largest Protestant Church, with
12 million members world-wide voted 53-47 to discriminate against the LGBT
community.</div>
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<br /></div>
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With nearly 7 million Methodists in the United States, the
younger parishioners polled (six in ten) believed homosexuality should be
accepted by their church.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, the
tightening of enforcement of church law was backed by a coalition of members
from African nations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No surprise
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Africa has little tolerance for
the practice of homosexuality, punishable by death, in some cases. (The strong
African conservative vote against Episcopalian gay rights also led to a schism
in the Episcopalian Church within the last ten years).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">“The Practice of
Homosexuality Is Incompatible with Christian Teaching.”</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The current church policy of the Methodists states
this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Doesn’t Christian teaching regard
all individuals as worthy of God’s love?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Shouldn’t a church be welcome to everyone?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Church should not be a country club that
picks its members.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">The Traditional Plan
vs. The One Church Plan</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In the Traditional Plan of The Methodist Church, the clergy
is punished if it officiates at a same-sex wedding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This plan won majority support in a
preliminary vote this week.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In a One Church Plan, individual churches can decide for
themselves whether to hire gay clergy or perform same-sex marriages.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It would eliminate church policy that says
that homosexuality is incompatible with Christianity. Consequently, the clergy
or the church would not be punished for going against church law.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In the future, I hope to see One Church Plans for the
Methodists.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I married a Southern
Methodist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was raised an Episcopalian,
still know the service by heart, second verses of the hymns, but probably have
some Methodist blood as my father’s name was John Wesley, same as the founder
of Methodism.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But my blood boils thinking about how my cis-gender daughter
could get married in a Methodist church, but our son could not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s sinful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If the Methodists don’t resort to the One Church Plans, we may find
ourselves returning to the dark, drafty Gothic Episcopal churches that I miss
anyway. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-39399820928277137102019-02-17T18:22:00.000-05:002019-02-17T18:22:56.807-05:00It's Not About You!<br />
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 3;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">It’s Not About You!</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In an OP-ED <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">New York
Times </i>column entitled “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">It’s Not a
Teenage Fad. It’s Life,” 1/09/19, </i>author Jennifer Finney Boylan remarks
that when her daughter came out, she felt as if “this person was now going to
be different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It made Jennifer think, at
first, that something precious was being taken away.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Boylan’s daughter was coming out as trans to her mother, a
trans activist, who transitioned twenty years ago. Jennifer had a tougher time
with her sexual identity back then.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But even if Jennifer were straight, she might have felt the
same way because many parents report grief when they are told their child is
LGBT.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, in effect, parents are
not losing a child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Kids are not here to
live out our version of how we want them to live their lives.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
To the contrary, being LGBT has advantages:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 38.4pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Children are happier.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are themselves and don’t have to hide
their identities.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 38.4pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>With a better understanding of your child and
honesty in your relationship, you can have a closer relationship.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 38.4pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>It’s a compliment that your child has shared
this important information with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
shows that he is comfortable enough to reveal this facet of his self even
though he may feel that he may be disappointing you. He feels secure enough
with you to come out.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
However, if you, at first, regard being LGBT as a
disadvantage:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>You may want to attend a Parents, Families and
Friends of Lesbians and Gays, now with Transgender groups) or PFLAG <a href="http://www.htttp//pflag.org.">http://www.htttp://pflag.org.</a> meeting
at which you discuss why you think being LGBT is “lesser than” being straight
even though your child is still the same person with the same attributes?</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>If you’re not comfortable with groups, see a
gay-friendly therapist. You can find a psychotherapist at the Psychotherapist
Association for Gender Diversity through Gaylesta<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="https://www.gaylesta.org/">https://www.gaylesta.org</a>.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Don’t think it’s a phase or choice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not going away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>To integrate this new information with the
concept of the child, don’t reject the child altogether.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writes Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D., co-author of
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To
Know (</i> Sterling, 2016), “it is very difficult to retract words such as “if
you’re gay, you are no longer my child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Or you can make a choice, continue to be part of this family or be gay
on your own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even if you disapprove, you
should display to your child in both words and actions that you will always
love and support your daughter or son.”</div>
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</style><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-11872400342976319392019-01-26T11:33:00.000-05:002019-01-26T11:33:34.369-05:00Supreme Court Bans Transgenders in the MilitaryOn Tuesday, January 22, 2018, The Supreme Court voted 5-4 to impose a ban on Transgendered adults in the military. But it's more complicated. Previously, lower courts had placed injunctions on the ban, but on the 22nd, some of these injunctions were put on hold so the ban can't go into effect <i>yet.</i><br />
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<i><b>Nefarious History</b></i><br />
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In July, 2017, our Commander-in-Chief Trump tweeted: " our military must be focused on decisive and overwhelming victory and cannot be burdened with tremendous medical costs and disruption that transgenders in the military would entail." <b>Myth: </b>The military, according to Christopher Ingraham of <i>The Washington Post, </i>July 26,2017, states that " the military spends four times as much on Viagra (even for retired military) as it would on transgender troops' medical care. Annually, the military spends 41.6 million on Viagra alone. <i><b> </b></i><br />
<br />
One month later, The White House put out an actual policy. Trump would return to pre-2016 era (before Obama's policy that transgender adults could serve in the military)<i><b> </b></i>in which trans troops could <i>not </i>serve openly. And that wasn't the only stipulation: it would also ban the military from paying for gender-affirming surgeries, with some exceptions such as "protecting the health of someone who had already begun transitioning." It also allowed the Secretary of Defense, after consulting with the Secretary of Homeland, "<i>some wiggle room," </i>to decide what to do with already serving trans service members and let them advise the President on reversing the ban. <br />
<i> </i><br />
The Federal Courts halted the ban from going through, finding in part that trans service members were able to joining the military. Starting on January 1, 2018, the military has <i>already </i>paid for some trans-inclusive medical services, <i>including </i>gender-affirming surgeries.<br />
<br />
In March, 2018, The White House, following a Pentagon review, rescinded the previous ban. This move was expected to ban most trans people from openly serving in the military with exceptions for people who already begun serving as trans prior to the memo and trans people "who have been "stable for three years in their biological sex prior to accession." The Lower Courts put the ban on hold.<br />
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<b>Some Wiggle Room?</b><br />
<br />
Stanley McChrystal, a retired **** Army General, who lead the <i>Joint Special Operations Command and NATO Forces </i>during the War in Afghanistan, says that the ban on transgender people serving in the military is a "mistake." Kristin Beck, retired transgender Navy Seal, who has multiple Service awards, agrees. Shane Ortega, 1st U.S.A. transgender soldier, now retired, told MSNBC that the ban perpetuates the "cycle of dehumanization."<br />
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McChrystal, Beck and Ortega all prove that transgenders in the military can be what the Pentagon calls "combat effective." Trans troops, who stay in the closet, will have mental health issues. It's dangerous for their service and their personal health and safety. If they are allowed to live openly, they will perform better in the military and not feel as if they are erased.<b> </b><br />
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<b> </b><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-88902958200911016412019-01-19T11:12:00.000-05:002019-01-19T11:12:44.689-05:00GENDA to ENDA discrimination & Ban Conversion Therapy in New York State New York parents will sleep better knowing that GENDA and Ban on Conversion Therapy passed the New York House and Senate on January 9, 2019. <br />
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GENDA or Gender Expression Non-Discrimination bill added gender identity and expression to the state's anti-discrimination laws as a protected class in housing, employment and public accommodations. Legally, it declares that being lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender is not a disease, disorder, illness, deficiency or shortcoming. <br />
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This passage in the Assembly (134-3) and Senate (57-4) is quite a victory for LGBT rights because since 2003, GENDA has been put forward in the New York State Legislature, but died in the Republican-controlled New York Senate. The bill was sponsored by all new 39 Democratic senators in the new Democratic majority and was sponsored by Senator Brad Hoylman, the only openly member of the Senate. <br />
<br />
Governor Cuomo is expected to sign this bill as well as the Conversion Therapy ban the week of January 21st. The ban on conversion therapy would prohibit licensed therapists from trying to change a minor's sexual orientation that The Human Rights Campaign refers to as a "fraudulent practice." (For more information about conversion therapy, see my blogpost <a href="https://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com/2018/11/you-cant-pray-gay-away.html" target="_blank">https://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com/2018/11/you-cant-pray-gay-away.html.</a>) Supporters said these two pieces of legislation are the most significant civil rights bills specifically impacting the state's LGBTQ community since same-sex marriage passed in 2011. <br />
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It would be great if ALL states could have these laws, but there is no FEDERAL law against discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 is a federal law that prohibits employees on the basis of sex, race, color, national origin and religion. Because there is ambiguity in the courts regarding the definition of sex, LGBT citizens are at the mercy of municipal and state law. In over half the U.S. states, you can still expect discrimination. Let's hope New York State will serve as a beacon for others. <br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-51851057317797812442018-12-13T22:18:00.000-05:002018-12-13T22:18:50.739-05:00Your Child Just Told You He's Gay. Now What?<br />
It’s holiday time and your child takes the initiative to come out to whomever is present at your family’s gathering. His rationale may be to “ get it over with” and tell family members all at once. It may not be the appropriate time with so many distractions for such unexpected news. Will your family and friends accept this new information? Or, is he just telling you privately? Either way, you want to “get your lines right.”<br />
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This news can backfire your child’s intent as it could spark emotions such as shock, disbelief, rejection, anger, and confusion on your part. Rather than reacting too quickly to the news, make the conversation easier. Try these tips:<br />
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•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Stay calm. The news may challenge your future expectations of your child, but with education and support, you will learn to accept his sexual orientation and gender identity. Find out what it means to be LGBT.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>You may want to work with a therapist who specializes in assisting LGBT teens. Now is not the time to show your disappointment.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Be supportive now even if you have reservations about his sexual orientation. Tell your child that you love him just as much.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Praise your child for having the confidence to reveal his gender identity and to trust you with this important information.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“Be mindful of what you say in the weeks and months following the coming out as he will be sensitive,” advises Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D., co-author of When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know (Sterling: 2016).<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Realize that this is just one of many conversations you will have in the future. Is your child being bullied in school?<br />
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Your level of acceptance can make a world of difference in your child’s self-esteem. Parental alienation can reinforce self-hatred, isolation, even suicide ideation.<br />
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•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> According to the Centers for Disease Control, the suicide rate for young people is up. Suicide is the second leading cause of death for people ages 15 to 24.LGBT youth attempt suicide 5 x more than non-LGBT youth.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>If you can’t cope with the coming out, don’t banish your child to the streets or make life so miserable for him that he chooses to leave.<br />
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Life on the streets is not only scary but commonplace. Here are the mind-boggling facts:<br />
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•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>LGBTQ young people are 120% more likely to experience homelessness than their non-LGBTQ peers. True Colors Fund.org<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>One in every 5 LGBT adults is homeless. Statistics from CreditDonkey.com/2/25/18 reveal that as many as 640,000 LEGBT youth are homeless. -<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Forty-six of homeless LGBT youth ran away because of family rejection.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Forty-three percent are forced out of homes by their parents. Source: circlecarecenter.org/popular-stories /the-frightening-statistics-behind-lgbt-youth-homelessness.<br />
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Once on the streets, roughly 80% of homeless teens use drugs or alcohol and<br />
are most likely trading sex to obtain the drugs/alcohol they use to self-medicate. As a result, their HIV rates are 3-9 times higher than the general U.S. population.<br />
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>For parental support, try these reputable organizations:<br />
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•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Everyone is Gay.com<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>https://pflag.org<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>https://www.glsen.org<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>https://ww.hrc.org<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>https://familyproject.sfsu.edu<br />
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For LGBTQ youth support and connections to LGBTQ population:<br />
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•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>http://www.cdc.gov/lgbthealth/youth/resources.html<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>https://www.thetrevorproject.com<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>http://www.samhsa.gov/resources-help-lgbt-youth...<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>http://www.pflag.org<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>http://itgetsbetter.org<br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-6472206421514852922018-11-29T22:50:00.000-05:002018-11-29T22:50:50.411-05:00World Aids Day 2018: What Does It Mean?<br />
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Saturday, December 1st is the thirtieth anniversary of World Aids Day. While scientific advances in HIV/AIDS research have resulted in anti-retroviral drugs like Prep and more awareness about safe sex contribute to a health problem that is not thought of as the alarming death sentence of the 80’s, AIDS is still a world-wide problem. It’s nothing to be complacent about.<br />
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It is estimated that 35 million people have acquired the disease. The symptoms don’t show up initially. In fact, many people don’t even know they have HIV. AIDS is caused by Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) infection which is primarily a sexually transmitted disease. However, you can also succumb from contaminated body fluids such as sharing needles or even blood transfusions. <br />
<br />
Because stigma and discrimination still deter people from taking a HIV test, they often don’t test until they feel symptoms. Often, they are initially too scarred to know the truth. The disease compromises your immune system and makes your body more prone to various infections such as pneumonia.<br />
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The purpose of World AIDS Day is to raise awareness about the importance of knowing your status from testing and to remove all barriers to accessing HIV testing. You will see interested people at United Nations agencies, governments and civil society, including schools joining to campaign around #WAD2018. They wear red ribbons and brooches to signify their support.<br />
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At present, the countries worst hit are Swaziland, Lesotho, Botswana, South Africa and Nambia. CIA WORLD Facebook reports that 27.2% of the population in Swaziland is carrying the disease. According to a Joint U.N. Programme on HIV/AIDS in 2017, 940,000 people died from related illnesses. This is the raison d’etre to know your status. It’s important not only for your own health, but also the health of others. <br />
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This same joint U.N. Program launched in 2014 contains the 90-90-90 agenda. The goal was to diagnose 90% of all HIV-positive persons, provide antiretroviral therapy (ART) for 90% of those diagnosed and achieve viral suppression for 90% of those treated by 2020.<br />
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To find out where to get tested and what tests you need in a fast, free, confidential setting near you, visit https://gettested.cdc.gov.<br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-68188941097214900552018-11-26T21:36:00.001-05:002018-11-26T21:36:39.434-05:00You Can't Pray The Gay Away!If you’re a religious parent who believes that being LGBT is a choice, think again! As of August 2018, fourteen U.S. states, District of Columbia, some counties and municipalities in the U.S. have passed laws banning the practice of conversion therapy on minors.<br />
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The American Psychiatric Association and the American Medical Association opposed conversion or reparative therapy years earlier. Homosexuality has not been regarded as a disease since 1973 when the American Psychiatric Association took it out out of their diagnostic tool, the DSM manual. <br />
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In 2012, Robert Spitzer, M.D. denounced his well-known study on gay culture and reparative therapy; the study didn’t conclude that conversion therapy actually worked. Not only was conversion therapy ineffective, it can cause depression, guilt, and even suicide!<br />
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It is estimated that 700,000 minors have been subject to conversion therapy. One such individual was Garrard Conley, author of the memoir, <i>Boy Erased, </i>upon which the movie, directed by Joel Edgerton, was based. If you want to see what it is like in these brainwashing, indoctrination programs in Christian “camps,” go see the movie.<br />
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Jared, played onscreen by Lucas Hedges, is gay and confesses his sexual orientation to his Baptist preacher father Marshall, played by Russell Crowe, in Arkansas. His wife Nancy, is played by Nicole Kidman and she goes along with her husband’s wishes to place Jared in a gay-to-straight “Love in Action” facility to cure Lucas of his attraction to boys and supposedly make him more masculine.<br />
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At first, Jared, feeling guilty because he feels he has sinned and disappointed his parents, agrees to go to the facility. However, once there, questions the whole program. A friend in the facility, Cameron, feels trapped: he is beaten with Bibles by his family at “Love In Action” and realizes he can’t go home. He commits suicide. Another friend, Gary, played by Troy Sivan, tells Jared to not question the program but fake it until he completes the assigned time.<br />
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Along the way, Jared has a college crush (Joe Alwyn) who rapes him, then calls Jared’s parents to out him. Jared leaves the facility with his Mother’s support (but not his father’s) and ultimately goes to New York where he becomes an author.<br />
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At the end of the movie, we are told that Victor Sykes, the gay conversion therapist at "Love in Action" played by Joel Edgerton, leaves the camp and is in a same-sex marriage. So is Garrard Conley. So much for the effectiveness of conversion therapy!<br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-40037036475038161452018-11-15T21:46:00.001-05:002018-11-15T21:46:48.948-05:00LGBT Couples Are Told They Can't Adopt<br />
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It’s been three years since The Supreme Court first recognized gay marriage. You would think with legalized same-sex marriage in the U.S., LGBT couples would automatically be able to adopt. Not so!<br />
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It is estimated that 8-10 million children are being raised in gay and lesbian households. As of 2016, LGBTQ adoption was made legal in fifty states yet restrictions were put on couples this year. By allowing publicly funded adoption agencies to discriminate against same-sex couples because of the agencies’ religious beliefs or convictions, they deny placement to LGBT couples. Ten states currently allow this denial. At least three states (Kansas, Oklahoma, and Michigan) have pending lawsuits against The Department of Health and Human Services.<br />
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Same-sex couples are six times more likely than heterosexual couples to be raising foster children. LGBT +couples are four times more likely to have an adopted child than heterosexual couples. Yet, the couples are turned away from agencies that receive taxpayer money because of their moral or religious convictions.<br />
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Unfortunately, the U.S. Children’s Bureau reports that the statistics for foster care have risen annually since 2012. Yet, the efforts of same-sex couples can be stymied by the whims of the religious, not unlike the Colorado baker who wouldn’t bake a wedding cake for a same-sex wedding.<br />
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The policy, like others, is not LGBT-friendly. Couples, whether straight or LGBT, have to prove that they are worthy of adopting and providing a good home. They are interviewed, reveal their financial status, have home studies where a social worker comes to your home to ascertain if your home is safe, clean, whatever. And you wait until you are chosen. <br />
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You have to really want to parent to comply with adoption agencies’ rules. We all know straight parents who have given birth to a surprise child. Those parents are not put through microscopes and had their motives for wanting children questioned.<br />
<br />
Consider the benefits of Same-sex adoption:<br />
<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Married same-sex couples tend to have higher incomes. The income of male couples was more than that of straight couples and female couples. –<br />
NBC News, March 5, 2018<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>According to UCLA’s Williams Institute, a think tank for research on sexual orientation and gender identity law and public policy, same-sex couples who adopt children are more diverse in socio-economic status and ethnicity.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>The Review of Research Prepared for American Sociological Association Amicus Brief in U.S.: Studies reveal that children raised in same-sex parent families fare just as well as children raised in different sex parent marriages.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>A University of S.C. Study concluded that kids with lesbian or gay parents show more empathy for social diversity are less confined by gender stereotypes, e.g. Zach Wahls raised by two lesbian mothers in Iowa. He is now a Democratic Senator in that state.<br />
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With over 400,00 children in foster care and LGBT couples willing to adopt, why humiliate and discriminate against the non-straight couples? The foster kids deserve love and the LGBT couples deserve to love them.<br />
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<div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-42869514290935157442018-11-03T22:20:00.000-04:002018-11-03T22:20:52.964-04:00The Ever-Increasing Alphabet of LGBT+. What Does It All Mean?<br />
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Chances are if your child comes out to you, he would most likely use the term gay, bisexual, lesbian, queer or trans. But as a parent, how do you keep up with all the other terms and know their definitions, particularly if you don’t have a knowledge of Latin? What is the + in LGBT+?<br />
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Here’s a primer:<br />
Allosexual: people who are attracted to at least one gender.<br />
Androsexual: people who are attracted to masculine gender presentation.<br />
Asexual: people who don’t experience sexual attraction<br />
Bicurious: people who are open to experiment with genders that are not only their own, but do not know if they are open to forming any sort of relationship with multiple genders.<br />
Cisgender: people whose personal identity and gender correspond to their birth sex.<br />
Cishet: people who are both cisgendered and heterosexual.<br />
Gender-fluid: moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity.<br />
Gynosexual: people being attracted to feminine gender presentation.<br />
Monosexual: people attracted to only one gender.<br />
Pansexual: people who are attracted to all genders<br />
Polysexual: people attracted to many genders.<br />
Queer: A reclaimed term for anybody in the LGBT+ community or who do not identify as cisgender and/or heterosexual/heteroromantic.<br />
Non-binary: an umbrella term for genders that fall somewhere in the middle of the gender spectrum and are neither strictly male or female. i.e. genderqueer.<br />
Transsexual: people who have had Gender Reassignment Surgery (GRS) to change their sexual organs that they were born with to that of a different gender.<br />
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>MtF: When somebody who is assigned as a male at birth identifies as a female.<br />
HtM: When somebody who is assigned as a female at birth identifies as a male.<br />
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There are many more terms, but this vocabulary will get you started.<br />
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For a good reference, look at http://www.Gender: Your Guide: A Gender-Friendly Primer on What to Know, What to Say, and What to Do in the New Gender Culture by Lee Airton, Ph.D.<br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-86652891726878334982018-10-21T21:29:00.000-04:002018-10-21T21:29:41.528-04:00Another Attempt At Erasing The Transgendered<br />
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First, it was the states’ trying to ban the federal protections that Obama put in place under Title IX barring discrimination and sexual orientation. In 2016, the Department of Education required schools to allow transgender students to use the restroom or locker room of their choice. If a school didn’t comply, it could risk losing federal funds.<br />
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Then, the present Administration wanted to bar transgender individuals from the military, but the military knew better.<br />
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Now, the Trump Administration wants to limit the meaning of gender to male or female on birth certificates. Passports would change language from gender as well to sex. The New York Times memo from the Department of Health and Human Services plans by the end of the year to create a legal definition of gender that will be sent to the Department of Justice. It would be defined as a fixed status, “on a biological basis that’s clear, grounded in science, objective, and administrable, unless rebutted by reliable genetic evidence.” Genetic testing would be used to determine a person’s gender.<br />
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The Dept. of Health and Human Services plans to create this edict under Title IX law that bans discrimination based on sex in federally funded education programs. In 2017, Trump’s administration thought that Obama’s directive was a “federal outreach.” The HHS department has argued that the term “sex” was never legally meant to include homosexuality and gender identity.<br />
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The effects of Limiting Federal Protections for The Transgendered Community:<br />
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According to the Williams Institute, a think tank for LGBT research in California, a 2016 study revealed that 1.4 million American adults identify as transgender. Yet, with society’s non-inclusion, their stigmatized existence has resulted in:<br />
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•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>64% of trans pupils are bullied for their sexual identity.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>82% of transgender youth feel unsafe at school.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2018 is the worse year for deadly assaults against transgender Americans.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Most of the violent deaths are against transgender people of color.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>More than ½ of transgender male adolescents attempt suicide.<br />
•<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Suicide rate is higher for transgendered than for LGB community.<br />
<br />
This new directive is undermining the welfare and rights of the LGBT people by eliminating federal protections. It could also be defining transgender out of existence.<br />
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8583045613089438515.post-89226756811240430492018-10-08T21:43:00.000-04:002018-10-08T21:43:00.362-04:00Not Coming Out on LGBTQ Awareness Day<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">October
11 is the 30<sup>th</sup> annual LGBTQ Awareness Day. The purpose of the day is
to make LGBTQ orientation more familiar to the public, reduce bullying, and
help foster allies in the fight for equality.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Although
it would be ideal if everyone felt he could come out, the LGBT child has his
own timeline.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tempting as it may be,
it’s not a good idea for a parent to push a child into coming out. The
child should come out when he is ready and when he does, parents should ask for
permission to tell others. Your child may only be out to a few people he
trusts and does not want everyone to know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s his story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">If a child does come
out to you on October 11 or any other date, make it his experience, recommends
Dr. Logan Stohle, PsyD. Of Yellowbrick, a psychiatric center for young adults
in Evanston, Illinois.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t bring up
your concerns at that time. Even if you don’t agree or understand your child’s
sexual orientation, now is not the time to question.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just listen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Says
Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D., author of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">When
Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know (2016, Sterling), </i>you might employ
these subtle ways to make your LBTQ child feel as supported as his heterosexual
brother/sister by:</span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br />
<br />
<span style="background: white;">•</span> <span style="background: white;">Asking
your child the same questions you ask your other children. Specifically,
don’t avoid the topic of dating and relationships. Be sure to invite the
significant other to family dinners or functions in the same way you would for
a partner of a straight child. From time to time, make a point of asking
your child how his significant others are doing, what are new with them, and so
forth.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br />
<span style="background: white;">•</span> <span style="background: white;">Accept
whatever your child tells you about his sexuality as hard fact and do not try
and convince him that he must be either straight or gay. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br />
<span style="background: white;">•</span> <span style="background: white;">The most
important thing is to make it clear to your child that sexual orientation is
only one part of who he is and that it has no bearing on your love for or
acceptance of him.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<div class="blogger-post-footer">Read more at http://straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com</div>straight parent gay kidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17697184343637269588noreply@blogger.com0